So why, Ellen, would you take your quest to the land of apartment scams and Ikea dressers?Surprisingly, she says, people are more honest there. Ellen has dabbled in online dating for almost two decades. And for a few years, I had profiles on Match and J-Date up at the same time.” Ellen's voice is warm and inviting. But as anyone who has spent more than five minutes in the dating scene knows, finding a true partner can be like searching for Waldo (as in “Where’s? And Waldo, Ellen says, was not on any of the dating sites she signed up for.You know where to go when you’re looking for a roommate, a job or a used bike, but have you used Craigslist for online dating?
Most of the people who contacted me about their experiences were male.
Themes of “dating” through Craigslist include don’t make expectations and be careful.
But it's not a stretch to say that even if you abstain from the goal, spending a week on Casual Encounters can teach you a lot about human beings and how the web has changed how we pursue one of our most essential and important desires.
It goes without saying that the content of this article is not intended for children or those made uncomfortable by such topics.
It results in far too much self-edited performance, preconceptions, and assumptions. Just make sure you put it in the right section (perhaps Casual Encounters: w4m? Use an email address that isn’t associated with your real name (go make a new one if you have to). Go do something productive for twenty minutes, like make dinner. Read between the lines a bit and notice how they’re approaching you.
I don’t care if the match-making is spot on — if we’ve laid out everything we know about ourselves before our first interaction, we’re going to get hung up on the pre-emptive storytelling and miss the heat of discovery. You’re not writing a full Ok Cupid profile, and you don’t want the same from them. There’s a delay on showing up in Craigslist searches and indexes, so refreshing your inbox right after you post your ad is only going to stress you out. Once the emails start coming in, they’ll fall into one of three categories: a) Spammers, scammers, and fake hot people who look too good to be true because they probably are. Hopefully, after two or three hours of collecting replies, at least one email has you intrigued. If none of them look interesting yet, check back tomorrow. Your goal on your first reply is to make a date for sex — it’s to get another interesting response out of them.
I’ve been thinking about Craigslist lately, and how oddly generous it is.
Craigslist is a particularly magical resource in the SF Bay Area because it started here. For me, it’s been most useful when I’m moving (finding an apt, finding furniture, helping me give stuff away, …), and when I’m looking for sex. I didn’t always turn to Craigslist, but the handful of times I did, it did not disappoint. But those stories are boring.) I’ve had far better luck with Craigslist than I have with Ok Cupid (a free dating site that’s also heavily used by the SF casual sex scene).
Write whatever you want, as much or as little as you want. It’s hard to believe anyone would use this medium to find love. But the down and dirty approach seems to represent Craigslist users to the T.