We waited a long time to focus on settling down, and now we’re facing a somewhat distressing fact of life: Once you’re over 40, there is a diminished pool of men to choose from.
In a recent Woman's Hour programme on first date etiquette, spaghetti, oysters and lobster were just some of the foods described as deal breakers.
Men were suspicious of women who ordered salad ("heavy interaction might take place with the fridge later on") or displayed overt greed ("if she flies at the food, she might fly at other things").
This is one of life’s big mysteries but sometimes I think the key is identifying the right places to look. When you’re over 40, you’re usually pretty comfortable in your own skin You know what you like, and what you don’t.
Maybe you would prefer to hang out at cafes, museums, film festivals and art galleries.
On average we all know about 250 other people, one or two of them are going to know someone else who is single and looking. We would like to wish you the best of luck with became a widow after 20 years of being with my husband and getting back into dating is not as easy as it was 20 years ago.
You can meet like-minded individuals in one of the millions of chat rooms that are available in cyber space. tell your date or give some idea so that one of you is dressed smart and one casual, some clothing can be nice to the touch, think about this when choosing a shirt.
Current clients – all female – include parole officers, psychotherapists and investment bankers (age range 30-70), who seek her advice on everything from how to spice up their internet profile to how to behave on a first date.
Her approach, based on marketing techniques gleaned from years working in big corporations, isn't romantic, but she's convinced it works.
Neither of these are "red lights" as far as dating, and it’s impossible not to have baggage at this age – the trick is just to find someone with "matching luggage." Tips on how to find someone with "matching luggage": Easy. Without ramming a written survey down their throat on the first date, do find out if they are interested in having a family or not. Divorced and dating again over the age of 40 can be a great opportunity to find someone who’s really committed to getting it right this time, and being creative and open to another committed relationship.
If you’re a biological clock owner, don’t bother going out with anyone who doesn’t want a family if you do. Watch out for bitter divorces (men and women) who are going to bring their unresolved anger over the divorce into your relationship with them.
Do I have to just ignore this baggage and date them anyway?